How to Help Your Teen Cope with End-of-Year Stress: 7 Therapist-Recommended Tools for Anxiety and Emotional Regulation
As we move through spring break, we enter the gauntlet of high school’s “end of the year”—a time rife with anxiety and stress. The end of the year stretch can be a harrowing time for parents and teens alike, as teens face an amping up of final assignments and tests, big projects due, and state testing. This final stretch can be a time of great anxiety for your teen as they try to navigate all the responsibility of completion. If your teenager already struggles with emotional regulation, self-harming behaviors, eating disorders, or just general anxiety, you may notice an amping up of these maladaptive behaviors at home. This is a sensitive and vital time for you, as a parent or legal guardian, to know how to support your teen and not cause any undue stress that leads to harm. In this blog, we will explore seven therapist-recommended tools for anxiety and emotional regulation to help you, the caregiver, support your teen. Read on!
Validate Without Fixing
Validating a teen's stress without immediately offering solutions can significantly impact their mental well-being. Think of the times when you’ve had a rough day, and just needed someone to say to you “you’re right, that is hard” instead of immediately offering solutions. With our children, it can be difficult to not immediately jump to fixing what’s wrong in their lives for them. After all, fixing problems is what we spent the first half of their lives having to do, as we slowly taught them how to become a functional human. Why wouldn’t fixing work now? Well, the truth is that your child is at a unique point in their life of not quite being an adult, but certainly no longer being a child. So, how do we support them through this transition? If it feels like walking a tightrope, it kind of is. One of the best things you can do is change the way you approach your child.
In order to teach yourself to validate your teen without fixing, first just teach yourself to listen. Listen to what they are saying. We want to use something called deep listening.
Deep listening is the intentional practice of fully attending to another person—mentally, emotionally, and somatically—without judgment, interruption, or the urge to respond. It goes beyond simply hearing words and instead focuses on understanding the speaker’s meaning, emotions, and unspoken needs.
It involves:
Presence: Being fully in the moment, setting aside distractions and inner chatter.
Empathy: Sensing and honoring the speaker’s emotional state.
Non-reactivity: Allowing space without jumping to conclusions, fixing, or offering solutions.
Reflective awareness: Noticing both what is said and what remains unsaid—tone, body language, pacing.
In the peer-reviewed study “Deep Listening Training to Bridge Divides: Fostering Attitudinal Change Through Intimacy and Self-Insight”, the researchers found that participants who underwent deep listening training experienced increased feelings of being understood and connected, leading to greater openness and self-reflection. These findings suggest that deep listening can be a powerful tool in reducing polarization and fostering mutual understanding.
Mutual understanding is what we are going for when we create a connection with our teens. It is the goal of our parent-teen interactions. So, all validation starts by learning to deeply listen! Using our tools of presence, empathy, non-reactivity, and reflective awareness, we first ground ourselves in the act of listening. Just by listening, we foster the connection needed to validate. Then, carefully, practice saying some validating phrases to your teen. They do not need to be generic; you know your teen best and what will best help them feel understood and seen. Keeping that goal in mind, validate, validate, validate! “I hear you,” “I see you,” “You’re right,” “That is hard!” Phrases like these validating phrases, tweaked to your teen, can help relieve immense stress just by hearing them.
If you’ve done all of the above, great! STOP THERE. Unless you’re invited by your teen into their problem-solving stage, do not attempt to follow up validation with fixing. This will undue all the work you’ve just done! Stop there, breathe, and call a friend later to help you vent about how hard this parenting thing is! You’ve got this!
2. Anchor the Nervous System
So, what does it mean to anchor the nervous system? It’s as simple as creating a calming home environment that your teen can come back to and rely on when they’ve had a rough day. Having a nervous system anchor can help regulate a teen's stress response.
When a teen is stressed, anxious, or overwhelmed, their nervous system can go into overdrive—shifting into fight, flight, or freeze. Before we can expect focus, communication, or resilience, we have to meet them where they are: in the body. Here are gentle ways to anchor and co-regulate.
1. Rituals of Regulation
Help your teen create small, sensory-rich rituals that signal safety to the nervous system:
A warm shower with eucalyptus or lavender
A favorite hoodie or soft blanket
A calming tea (like chamomile or lemon balm) in a mug they love
Lo-fi music or nature sounds while studying
By creating these rituals, you give your child something to anchor themselves to when they are stressed. You want to make sure that the rituals you create are soothing and help the parasympathetic nervous system to relax out of fight/flight. For a neurodivergent child, this may look like extra electronic time, or time spent on a special interest. You know your child best; choose rituals that work for your child. Remind them that these are available in times of high stress.
2. Body Doubling for Focus
Sit quietly nearby while they do homework. You don’t need to say anything. Your calm presence provides a co-regulating effect that helps their nervous system stay grounded and their mind engaged. This is especially powerful for neurodivergent teens.
“Want me to just sit with you while you knock some of this out?” can be more helpful than trying to motivate or direct. Or, for extra points, just do it, and don’t ask. Sometimes the asking can be overwhelming to a teen in dysregulation.
3. Mindful Connection and Nurturing through alternative therapies, like MCN.
Alternative health practices are intentionally designed to regulate the nervous system—through deep listening, attuned presence, and energy-focused support. For teens who are neurodivergent, emotionally sensitive, or just fried from a long year, these alternative approaches can be powerful.
You might offer:
A 10-minute grounding meditation together
Gentle bilateral stimulation (like walking side-by-side or rhythmic tapping)
Breathwork for co-regulation—slow inhales and extended exhales while seated together
Consider booking a Reiki or Microcurrent Neurofeedback session for your child.
For more on how MCN works with the nervous system, especially in neurodivergent teens, check out this post on MCN and emotional regulation.
4. "Name It to Tame It"
When your teen is spinning out, help them gently name what’s happening:
"I think your body’s feeling like it’s in survival mode right now. Want to take 5 to reset before we come back to this?"
Just naming it activates the thinking brain and down-regulates the stress response. By naming things, we take away the anxiety of the “unknowing”. It can be scary if we don’t have words to name what is happening to us. Naming something can help give our brains the information it needs to begin the process of understanding, feeling safe, and regulating. Help your teen name what’s happening to them by exploring emotional words. An emotion chart like this can be helpful for learning new language. Try to offer this in a time of connection; when your child is already stressed, their brain isn’t processing new information.
5. Nature as Nervous System Medicine
If all else fails: go outside.
Lay on the grass, walk barefoot in the yard, or simply sit together under a tree. Nature regulates the human nervous system at a primal level. No advice needed. Just presence. Breathe.
Try some of these anchoring techniques with your teen, or help your teen create their own. Remember, the key is to soothe and calm the nervous system. What that looks like depend on your teen. Your teen will always be the best source of information on what works for them!
3. Let Sleep Be Sacred
Helping your child get enough sleep can be a real point of contention in the home. I’ve seen communication break apart at this point between parents and teens, with both sides getting frustrated and angry on this topic. The truth is, teens need sleep, and our culture of electronics makes this more difficult than ever. Research shows that good sleep, long sleep, is vital for brain functioning, and can greatly improve health, while decreasing stress levels exponentially. So, how do you support your child in getting sleep when there is so many alternatives? Well, the answer, once again, depends on your teen. If you can and it doesn’t harm your relationship with your child, try to have a set time for picking up phone/electronics. Having a conversation about the importance of sleep when they are regulated and calm is a good start. Involve them in the process of decision making. Remember, they aren’t quite adults but are no longer children, and the more decision making they get to do in their own lives, the better their outcome will be as adults. So, with good boundaries, we want to have these conversations with our children involved.
This may look like presenting research on why sleep is important, or just having a connected conversation about their health. Again, this is done in a time of regulation. If your teen is always dysregulated, you’ll need to back up and work on emotional regulation before you work on this piece, or seek out therapy to help your child find someone they can talk to about their stress. Parental support is associated with better sleep patterns in adolescents, especially under conditions of family stress. This support can mitigate the negative effects of stress on sleep. PubMed
Once you’ve figured out how to stop the electronics at night with their consent/support, then you can help them by offering sleep support, like the above anchors we discussed in part 2. Make sleep sacred by playing soothing music, having fresh, clean sheets, encouraging warm baths, and reading a book at night. These are all natural gateways to great sleep. If your child has trouble falling asleep, speak to your pediatrician; they may suggest sleeping supplements like magnesium or melatonin. Overall, sleep is incredibly important, for both you and your child! By making it sacred and soothing, you can create an environment that teaches good methods to regulate stress that you’re teen can take into adulthood.
4. Help Them Sort the Chaos (But Don’t Take the Wheel)
The end of the year can feel like cognitive scrambled eggs for teens. Deadlines, final projects, emotional goodbyes, body changes, friend drama, prom, college letters, existential dread... it's a lot. A lot lot. And it’s a lot for everyone!
Their executive functioning is still developing, and during stress? It’s even harder to prioritize or break things down into manageable steps. When they are in their flight/flight brain, like at times of great stress, they aren’t taking in ANYTHING.
But—and this is important—they often don’t want you to do it for them. Remember when we talked about not fixing? This is that, but with some next steps for when they DO need guidance, but on their own terms. What they need is a calm, grounded co-pilot—not a driver who grabs the wheel. So let’s break down what this actually looks like—the do’s and don’ts.s!
What this can look like:
Sitting down with a pen and paper and asking, “Want to just dump everything on your mind, and we’ll sort it after?”
Saying, “Okay, so if this week feels like a mountain, what’s the first little rock we can move?”
Offering a color-coded planner or a dry erase calendar, but letting them choose how to use it
Helping them categorize tasks: “What’s due tomorrow? What’s optional? What needs more brain energy?”
It’s not about fixing their to-do list—it’s about co-regulating their overwhelm until their clarity returns.
What this doesn’t look like:
Barking orders like “Just finish your essay already!”
Hovering or micromanaging their schedule
Dismissing their stress as laziness or poor time management
Taking over the organization or planning process without consent
Even if you're capable of creating the perfect study plan, it doesn’t empower them—it trains them to rely on someone else’s brain instead of learning to trust their own. So, just offer some options for your teen to consider, and don’t force it. Remember, they are in charge! You’re just along to offer support and let them know there are options, but it’s up to them to choose which option they’d like. Doing this sets them up for handling stress on their own in the future. A win-win!
Therapist Insight:
This approach strengthens what psychologists call scaffolding—supporting developing skills while slowly transferring responsibility. It respects your teen’s growing autonomy and acknowledges their need for support.
It says:
“I believe in you, and I’m here to help you.”
That message alone can calm the chaos more than any checklist. Parental support plays a crucial role in shaping adolescents' coping strategies and stress levels, particularly in managing academic stressors. Supportive parenting is linked to increased engagement and comfort-seeking coping strategies. OUCI
5. Let Conversations Happen Sideways
Some of the most honest, beautiful things your teen will ever say to you won't happen during a “talk.” They’ll spill out when you’re washing dishes together, driving down a quiet road, or sitting on the porch at dusk. There’s a reason for this: their stress level drops when you aren’t talking about “the thing” directly…when they have room to breathe and think…that’s when you can really have some incredible conversations that help them feel supported. That’s because teens—especially when under stress—often feel cornered by direct, intense communication. Eye contact can feel too vulnerable. “How are you really doing?” might sound more like a trap than an invitation. But side-by-side moments? Those feel safe. Have you ever noticed that your teen seems to want to talk late at night? There’s a reason for this! Read on.
Why It Works (From a Nervous System Perspective)
Side-by-side interactions reduce the nervous system’s threat response. Without direct eye contact or “big feelings talk,” the brain is less likely to go into fight, flight, or freeze. That means your teen can stay emotionally regulated while processing something hard. Often, this occurs at the most mundane times, like when riding to the store, or late at night when you’re about to head to bed.
To encourage these conversations, try saying:
“I’m heading to the store—want to ride along with me just for the quiet?”
“Want to take a walk and not talk about anything unless you feel like it?”
It’s not about tricking them into talking. It’s about letting them know the door is always open, and they don’t have to knock loudly to be let in. Engaging in low-pressure conversations can encourage teens to open up. The American Psychological Association emphasizes the importance of open communication between parents and teens to manage stress effectively. American Psychological Association. So give it a try, and be open to the most surprising of conversations at any time. The less pressure you put on your teens to talk, the more they may open up. Like everything, a bit of reverse psychology is often at play when it comes to teen stress and anxiety.
6. Celebrate Effort, Not Just Outcome
We live in a culture obsessed with achievement, but there are so many opportunities for us as parents to praise the effort, not the outcome. Whether it’s an assignment, a new outlook on a friendship, a positive interaction with a teacher, or some other effort on the part of our teens toward the outside world, we can celebrate them. Through celebration, we trigger oxytocin to release in the brain, which helps reduce stress and increase loving feelings of connection. The one caveat to this may be if your child has Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA), when celebration may feel like a demand, and therefore act in reverse to create more stress. But for most kids, celebrating their effort is a wonderful way to show them that they matter no matter what the outcome. Sometimes, this is just what they need to reduce pressure and stress. And let’s face it; their lives won’t be defined by a grade on a high school project or test. So maybe it’s okay to let some of them go.
Further support: Reflect their growth back to them. They don’t always see it. Let them know you see how they are trying, growing, and changing. Celebrate the small efforts of your teen, and watch their confidence soar, and their stress reduce.
7. Model Emotional Grounding
What is emotional grounding?
Emotional grounding is the practice of bringing yourself—or someone else—back into a state of inner steadiness when emotions begin to overwhelm. It’s how we come back to our bodies, the present moment, and a felt sense of safety when our nervous system starts to spiral.
It doesn’t mean suppressing emotions. It means staying connected to your center while feeling them.
Think of it like this:
Imagine your emotions are like waves in the ocean—anger, anxiety, grief, joy.
Emotional grounding is the anchor that keeps you from being swept away.
It allows you to ride the wave without becoming the wave.
Emotional grounding allows you to treat emotions like guests in your body—just passing through, without attachment.
In therapeutic language:
Emotional grounding activates the parasympathetic nervous system—the part of your body responsible for calm, rest, and regulation. It pulls you out of fight-flight-freeze and into a space where your prefrontal cortex (the thinking, reflective brain) can re-engage. It’s particularly important, especially in neurodivergent individuals, to return to the pre-frontal cortex before engaging in conversation or trying to think one’s way through anything.
Grounding techniques might include:
Naming what you feel: “I’m noticing a lot of tension in my chest right now.”
Tuning into the senses: “I can feel the warmth of this mug… I hear the hum of the fridge.”
Breathwork: Lengthening the exhale to calm the vagus nerve
Physical grounding: Bare feet on the earth, wrapping in a blanket, holding a stone
Energetic or spiritual practices: Visualizing roots from your body into the earth, calling in your guides, chanting or toning
Emotional Grounding for Teens
When a parent grounds themselves during their teen’s meltdown or overwhelm, they offer co-regulation. It’s the nervous system version of saying:
“I’m not scared of your emotions. I can stay calm while you feel big things.”
That’s healing in itself. You don’t have to be perfect. You just have to be grounded enough to show them it’s safe to feel. When you stay calm in the face of their big emotions, you give them permission to feel without shame.
“You’re allowed to feel messy. I’m still here.”
When parents model emotional regulation, it can positively influence their children’s ability to manage emotions. A meta-analytic review in the Journal of Adolescence confirmed that parents' emotion regulation is significantly associated with children's emotional and behavioral outcomes. SAGE Journals. So before you ask your child to emotionally regulate by stopping a meltdown, crying, or screaming, make sure you are emotionally grounded and able to stay calm in the face of their anxiety storm.
We hope this blog has given you some good ideas on how to help your teens through the highly emotional period between spring-break and the end of the school year. While teen anxiety can feel overwhelming for both the teen and family, the interventions listed here will go a long way to creating an atmosphere of calm support, reduced stress, and positive connection. If you need further help, please contact Erin Rosenblum, MFT here and get more information about Microcurrent Neurofeedback sessions, or therapy for your teen. Wishing you the best as you navigate these difficult and rewarding times with your teen!
Citations:
American Psychological Association. (n.d.). Teens and stress: How parents can help. https://www.apa.org/news/press/releases/stress/2014/teen-stress
El-Sheikh, M., Kelly, R. J., Buckhalt, J. A., & Hinnant, J. B. (2017). The roles of parental support and family stress in adolescent sleep. Journal of Adolescent Health, 61(4), 465–471. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jadohealth.2017.05.002
Itzchakov, G., & Kluger, A. N. (2023). Deep Listening Training to Bridge Divides: Fostering Attitudinal Change Through Intimacy and Self-Insight. Journal of Applied Social Psychology, 53(1), 1–15. https://doi.org/10.1111/jasp.13086Wiley Online Library+2ResearchGate+2Wiley Online Library+2
Morris, A. S., Criss, M. M., Silk, J. S., & Houltberg, B. J. (2022). Parent emotional regulation: A meta-analytic review of its association with parenting and child adjustment. International Journal of Behavioral Development, 46(1), 63–82. https://doi.org/10.1177/01650254211051086
Ratliff, E. R., Morris, A. S., Cui, L., Criss, M. M., & Houltberg, B. J. (2023). Supportive parent-adolescent relationships as a foundation for adolescent emotion regulation and adjustment. Frontiers in Psychology, 14, 1193449. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2023.1193449
Zimmer-Gembeck, M. J., Rudolph, J., Kerin, J., & Bohadana-Brown, G. (2023). Parental support and adolescents' coping with academic stressors: A longitudinal study of parents' influence beyond academic pressure and achievement. Journal of Youth and Adolescence, 52(1), 1–14. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10964-023-01864-w